Sunday, August 8, 2010


Better After currently has voting open for an "Ugly Lamp" contest and it makes me wish I had kept the ugliest lamp I ever owned, which I dubbed "The Killer Cat Lamp".  

My friend Beth had given it to me as it was a present from a fella she was no longer dating she thought my son might like it as a nite light for his room as he had expressed interest in it before.   the only reason she had kept it in the first place was not to hurt his feeling because, egads, it was ugly.  It had the shape of a giant shampoo bottle (nothing wrong with upcycling) except that it had intentionally been made that shape out of very thick rosy pink plastic with a cutout in the front and some shrubbery glued to the insides with a figurine of what creepily looked like a taxidermied mini-kitten with realistic looking green plastic eyes.  The covering for the kitten was made out real fur from some animal.  My son like it but it creeped me out.  

One night when I was tucking him in, it fell off of his nightstand and hit me square in the eye and I got a black eye.  The only useful purpose it served as a prank on my old boss around Christmas time - before he came in I plugged it in his office and turned it on then shut door.  I sat near him and hear him utter "Dear God!" when he opened the door but nothing other than that.  I gave it about 10 minutes and was going to ask him if he liked his new Christmas present but by the pained look on his face I couldn't go through with it and had to fess up it was a gag.  He was relieved that it was not expected to be on his desk year round and many people asked me if the reason my friend had dumped the guy was over the lamp.   It broke during our move several years ago and I never took a picture (did not want any reminders) so sadly I could not enter.

Here is some of the contenders from Round 3 of Better After's lamp contest:

This one is entitled "Princess Skull".  I can so picture this my son's room when he was about 7.

This one is entitled "Birds and The Bees".   To me this looks too eclectic - like Grandma picked out the stuff to fill the jar for the bottom and one of the grandkids picked up something cartoonish for the shade.

This would be good from my room with a few alterations, like gluing long hair and making those chaps look a$$less to look more like Chippendale's dancers.

In Round 2 this transgendered alien matodor lamp gets my vote.

From Round 1 I am torn between voting for this flubby faced hillbilly almost a moonshine jug lamp and

this lamp entitled the "Brothel" lamp.  I would call it the "Inter-centennial 80's Lamp" because to  me the top looks like a well-worn wanna be classy 1800's ladies' brocade hoop skirt and 80's kitch vase for the base.

By the way...the base is the same shade of rose pink that the "Killer Cat Lamp" was.

To see all the entries and vote visit Better After.

Pictures from Better After

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